Girlfriend Material by Katia Rose

Author:Katia Rose [Rose, Katia]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Published: 2022-10-22T23:00:00+00:00

Chapter 14

Allison

I pull my phone out as I wait for Cassidy to show up at a café a few streets over from the MCA campus. There’s a near-constant stream of people grabbing to-go orders at the counter as they head out to enjoy the sunny and—by late March in Montreal standards—warm afternoon, but only a few of the tables are occupied.

I stretch out in one of the leather armchairs I grabbed for us, my mocha’s ceramic white mug resting on the low table between them. I scroll through a couple apps while I wait, and my fingertip keeps drifting towards my text history as almost every meme I come across makes me think of sending the post to Kate.

There’s a pang in my stomach each time I realize I’m chuckling to myself as I imagine her laughing or replying with some dumb but hilarious comment. The pain isn’t as sharp as it was a week ago, when I walked out of her apartment building feeling like a whole quiver’s worth of arrows had been shot straight into my chest like the final scene of The Fellowship of the Ring.

Even then, I didn’t turn back. I kept moving forward, all the way home and all the way through the next week of my life.

I didn’t sit with her in any of our classes. I didn’t call her in the middle of the night. I didn’t even pull up our text conversation to draft a ‘let’s end this friend break’ message. The first few days were brutal, like my skin was peeling off in big itchy flakes I forced myself not to scratch, but the next few days began to teach me something.

I can be okay without Kate. I can get through the day just fine without asking for her reassurance. I can sit on my own in class without wondering if anyone is going to make fun of me for being a ‘weird loner.’ I can text Cassidy without bombarding Kate with a bunch of potential message options first.

As I’m about to prove, I can even break up with Cassidy without getting Kate’s advice on how to do it.

I’m not sure this even counts as a breakup, but when Cassidy walks through the door of the café and scans the room before waving when her eyes land on me, my shoulders tense with resolve instead of panic. I no longer feel like I’m trying to squeeze myself into a box I’m not even sure I fit.

I’m breaking out of that box. I’m blowing that box to bits. I’m doing the right thing for me—and Cassidy—and I don’t need anyone but me to tell me that.

“Hey!” Cassidy walks over and drops her canvas school bag onto the chair across from mine. “Oooh, is that a mocha?”

I nod, the motion stiff. Even if I know this is the right thing to do, I still feel like my whole body has tensed up at the threat of conflict hanging in the air. “Yeah, they do a really nice one here.

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